Prodigies in Chafing – Five Star Trek TNG Characters That Rub Me the Wrong Way

I’ve been rewatching the series and most of the time I absolutely love the show, but let me tell you, there are some really, really irritating characters tucked away, which can generate such a strong facepalm reaction there should be a warning label to remove your glasses in the Netflix summary.

The Skin of Evil

This oily character would probably have been an effective villain if it hadn’t had three key faults.Skin of Evil

ONE-

Its speech impediment is so nasty it can hardly be understood.  “Bwahahaha, I’m going to kill Tasha Yar!”

“What?”

“I said I’m going to—”

“Can’t understand a word dude.  Sounds like you’ve got a mouth full of motor oil and marbles.”

TWO-

He looks like a wookie who swam too close to a BP oil rig.  A sorry sight yes but not really that threatening.

THREE-

The core reason he’s irritating though is that he’s too heartless with pointless motivation.  I enjoy a villain I can relate to and can feel his or her cause.  I can’t sympathize with this guy.

Lieutenant freakin’ Barclay.

BarclayThis nervous, simpering character needs no explanation.  When I see his name on the show summary on Netflix I have to fight my urge to skip it.  (I’m rewatching them all dammit!!!)  How’d this head-case pass the psych evaluation to get into Star Fleet?

“Let’s see, test shows he’s stark raving nuts with a tendency for lewd holodeck behavior.  Let’s put him in charge of something with antimatter.”

Barclay needs to go back to welding armor plating onto semis (If you get that… you’re cool).

All Ferengi

I love how these guys first show up as uber powerful aliens with massive ships chocked full ferengio’ scary tech.  However, they proceed to break down into bad likenesses of horny chimpanzees.

Data- “According to our records, the Ferengi throw poo.”

Troy- “It’s a cultural practice we must respect.”

Could we make a villain more irritating?  Well… yes, but then I’d definitely start skipping episodes.

Any character who plays a snobby Chopin piece.

Princes of BoringSeriously, is everyone in the future a prodigy of boring?  Where’s the 24th century’s Deadmau5?

Jordi- “Where are you going?”

Dr. Crusher- “I’m heading over to the Rave in 10 Forward.  O’Brien’s DJ’ing.”

Jordi- “NICE!”

Sadly this pulls one of my beloved characters (Data) into the mix.  He is the only one who gets a pass, but BARELY because isn’t going to a concert by him the equivalent of sitting down to listen to one of those automated Yamaha pianos sew through a few tunes?

“Are you going to come to my recital of Piano Sonata number 1?”Q-tip Jitsu

“No… HELL no.  I’m going to a Q-tip Jitsu match with Riker on Risa.”

If you haven’t seen Q-tip Jitsu, you should study Riker and his father’s fights.  The outfits are… while not instilling great respect… are… well… they’re ridiculous.

Dr. Katherine Polaski.

PolaskiI couldn’t stand the combative nature of this character.  Conflict between characters should have grounds in something the audience can identify with.  Someone once told me it was just that I didn’t like strong female characters.  No, I don’t like rude characters.  True strength has little to do with unwarranted brashness.  Can you imagine working with her?  She’d pronounce your name wrong, and when you corrected her, she’d scan you as she accused you of having a circuit for hurt feelings.  Stuff it doc!  When Crusher showed back up in season 3 I could have hugged her.

 What characters make you groan when they come on screen?

Who’s your favorite?

 Awesome

 

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14 Responses to Prodigies in Chafing – Five Star Trek TNG Characters That Rub Me the Wrong Way

  1. Piper Bayard says:

    Well done! Annoying characters? Jar-Jar Binks. I know he was Star Wars and not Star Trek, but he was so annoying that he deserves to be mentioned in all annoying categories. Will Riker gets an annoyance nod for bestiality–if it’s called that when it’s a human and an alien. I don’t think he ever did sleep with a human. And Counselor Cleavage is on the annoying list. P.C. out of control, while her neckline is the equivalent of the 1960s skirts cut up to the hoo-hah. This was not an advancement for women characters.

    Favorite characters? No one does it like The Shat. That man is the luckiest actor on the planet. If he hadn’t landed that role, he would have died in obscurity as the manager of a McDonald’s in a small town in Iowa. But he’s brilliant in it. Love The Shat. I have to say, though, that my favorite post-series character is Sulu, but only because George Takei is a superstar of a human being.

    Thanks for the fun flashback. :)

    • Jason Andrew Bond says:

      Bwahahah thanks for the laugh Piper. My wife and I often comment on Troy’s outfits. Really? Does she have to show the twins to get the job done? :)

      P.S. Totally agree on both The Shat and Takei!

  2. CKoepp says:

    My favorite and least favorite character is Q. The first couple of appearances of Q, he was an interesting almost too-powerful bad guy.

    Later appearances, he became almost a whiny twerp who needed a good slapping.

    • Jason Andrew Bond says:

      My wife was sorely disappointed that I did not choose Q for my list. I do admit that I put his heart on the scale as it were. I agree that the character kind of devolved into a comic role as the series progressed. I mean the archaeologist/theif goes with him to have adventures? What?

  3. Edward Forrest Frank says:

    My favorite character is Lieutenant Barkley. He is someone who is painfully shy and has problems, but still want to contribute to the exploration of the universe. He is a brilliant man that struggles to overcome his own problems and the perceptions of others, and manages to come through in the end.

    • Jason Andrew Bond says:

      I find all your points valid Edward. I suppose if I psychoanalyzed my dislike of Barclay, I would find that he reminds me too much of my high school self. :) Still, I think he and Mr. T should get together and prep the Enterprise to take out some bad guys who are holding a girl’s father hostage.

  4. I TOTALLY want the Captain Kirk poster at the bottom of this post. MUST HAVE IT.

    Meanwhile, I pretty much agree with all of this — I’ve been going through the entire Star Trek series via DVD with my kiddo. We’re almost done with DS9. I will say, however, that the ferengi start to grow on you with time. Lots of time.

    • Jason Andrew Bond says:

      I know. I still can’t hear anything over the sound of how awesome he is. :) My wife and I will be heading on to DS9 soon… I haven’t seen them in a long time, but I also remember the Ferengi character improving. :)

  5. OMG this is too funny! I am a huge fan of Star Trek but you definitely named these right. What about Wesley Crusher? He annoyed me A LOT! Have to disagree with Piper though. I loved Riker. have to admit I had a crush. My favorite character is Mr Spock. He was the best.

  6. I might be the only person on the planet to have never watched an entire Star Trek episode all the way through, but I still got a few chuckles from the post. Well done, Jason.

    • Jason Andrew Bond says:

      So Suzanne… did they not allow you to watch it in Beijing? Yeah, I’m callin’ you a commie for not watching Star Trek. LOL Glad I could coax out a few laughts. :)

  7. How clever this post is: I don’t even watch ST, and I still laughed out loud. Nice job.

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